I remember looking at myself in the mirror. I thought "Who is this person? Are they ill? What is wrong with them?" My pale complexion seemed to fade even more, leaving me ghostly and tired. What had happened though? Where had I gone? I was somewhere inside the hideous body I was staring at.
I guess I was lost
Go out and have a good time. No, no. Socializing means people. No, thanks. What was I scared of?
Written 02.14.04
I look around
But I know you're not there
And that has always been my fear
Looking for something that isn't
I've only been fooling myself
You're not here anymore
Left a long time ago
This I already knew
It was all false hope
You're not coming back
It doesn't matter what I do
I still remember your look
I still feel the hurt
The hand squeezing in my chest
I guess I should've never took
Just one chance I ask
But I should know
Written on 02.22.04
Rise back up again
Say a short thank you
And give a small wave
But the thoughts are screaming at you
The feelings are beating you
'Cause you know you're on the edge
You're about to fall again
No, no
It doesn't matter how happy you feel
You've still got the hurt
Just passed the shame
To the right of lonely
All leading you to the end
Nothing, really
Just a little bruised you say
But I know
I see in your eyes all you hide
It's not the same
You're still low
But that's how it'll always go